I recently wrote a Facebook posts about how using the word combinations “mental health” or “mental illness” can be compared to the feeling you get when you watch a horror film. Absolutely no one wants to use those words because society has attached such shame them. Like I said on Facebook, I get it. I don’t like to use them either, especially since we can’t seem to escape the negative stigma attached to them. It’s the very reason I make a conscious effort to say mental fitness, mentally fit or mentally unfit instead of those scary horror film words above.
The same holds true when naming the symptoms you experience when you’re in a mentally unfit state of mind. I feel out of sorts, overwhelmed, unable to sit still, like I can literally crawl out of my skin, worried about everything, like I can’t eat and/or sleep. My heart races and my adrenaline kicks in to the point that I feel like I can get up and run from danger; only there is no danger. Now, I’ve basically described the feeling one gets when experiencing symptoms of ANXIETY. To say that word, however, makes me feel like I should be in a private room where everyone uses first names only and quietly whispers that they have anxiety. When to be honest we ALL have experienced or will experience similar feelings at some point in our lives. It’s society that makes us feel like we are the ONLY ones on earth who have ever experienced symptoms of anxiety and this is simply not true.
So, here it goes…my name is Kela and I experience anxiety! I have experienced it most of my adult life. As a matter of fact, my paternal side of the family is riddled with it. My anxiety is usually attached to some hugely stressful event in my life. It first started when I was in a really bad car accident my senior year in high school. It lasted for a few months and went away. It resurfaced after my father died when I was 23. Again, it lasted for a few months and went away. It returned 10 years later after being on bed rest for most of my pregnancy and delivering my 5 year old son prematurely. This time around it has kind of lingered. Although I don’t experience it every day, I experience it enough to know that most of the reason it has lingered for so long is because I was starting to view it like someone who had leprosy in the Bible. It has taken years and THERAPY to convince me that it’s just anxiety…geeze! I am not the only one who has or will experience it. I am just one of the few to actually admit it. What society fails to realize is that you actually perpetuate the stigma by remaining quiet. Silences further confirms that there is something shameful about experiencing symptoms of being mentally unfit and it keeps us all on “isolation island.” The only reason no one is horrified at the thought of mentioning that they have cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes or darn near any other physical illness because society doesn’t make us feel shameful for admitting it. But we can change that simply by being more open about it and if you need to avoid those “horrific” words to do so, avoid them. There is no shame in admitting that there are days when you feel overwhelmed, stressed out, over worked, unmotivated, agitated, uneasy, unable to sleep, unable to eat or eating too much. Guess what? You are part of millions of people who feel, will feel or have felt the exact same way. So I guess I’m one of the first to talk on “isolation island” and I proudly accept the responsibility to crush the stigma! Who’s next?
Be Well,
Kela