Someone posted an article on Facebook the other day regarding tips for dealing with people who have anxiety. Among them were things like: don’t get frustrated, don’t take things personally, offer to be there for them when they need you, don’t guilt trip them and never stop inviting them to do exciting activities. All are great tips, but there are also tips that the anxious person must take into consideration to make it better for a loved one dealing with their anxiety. These tips will help a loved one better understand you, and help you take your power back. Below are 5 tips for the anxious person.
- Be clear about how you’re feeling. Don’t just cancel on dinner plans or any plans for that matter and make your friends/family guess what’s wrong. If you continue to do so, they will take it personally. Instead, just be clear about why you’re canceling. It’s completely ok to say, “I thought I’d be up to it, but I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed or anxious. Maybe next time, I’ll feel better.” This way, your loved ones will not take it personally and will be able to offer supportive words of encouragement.
- Avoid keeping it secret. Anxiety is NOTHING to be ashamed of; millions of Americans battle it everyday. There’s no need to keep it a secret, especially from family and friends. Trying to keep it a secret only reinforces the stigma, keeps you on “isolation island” and wages a war in your mind. Don’t do it. You have nothing to be ashamed of. Once you realize that, anxiety starts to have less power over you.
- Forgive yourself. Don’t beat yourself up because you don’t feel up to dinner with friends. Don’t beat yourself up because you take 2 steps forward and 1 step back. Don’t beat yourself up because you experience anxiety. Learn to forgive yourself; knowing that you are doing everything you can to take your power back.
- Design your life. Maintaining a mentally fit state of mind is not a sprint; it’s a journey and a lifestyle change. You have to learn to design your life in a way that supports your ability to be YOUR. BEST. SELF. and you have every right to do so. That means if something doesn’t feel right for you, don’t do it. At the same time, don’t allow anxiety to keep you from taking risks. Many times you have to move through it, whether you’re afraid or not, to get to it [your goal]. However, the beauty of this tip is that you get to move at your pace.
- Just keep swimming. That was one of my favorite lines from the movie Finding Nemo. It means never give up. When things get challenging and SEEM impossible (and they will), keep reminding yourself of what you’re capable of. When you don’t have the mental energy to do so, make sure you’ve surrounded yourself with an awesome support system who will give you that reminder. But whatever you do, don’t stop swimming. You can stop and rest along the way, use flotation devices as support, and your head might even go underwater from time to time. All of that is ok just as long as you keep swimming. You will make it to your destination; that amazing point in your life when you finally realize that you actually CAN design your life in a way that supports your ability to be your best self.